Gardy (manager, garden gnome): "Mauer and Morneau are so awesome it's ridiculous. They make me want to do a happy dance and throw my hat in a good way...not in the angry way I did this summer. With Mauer and Morneau we can all throw our hats in joy! And then we can all win manager of the year. Or not."
Joe Nathan (Teammate, pirate): "A;BLKAJEPROW!!!!!!!! JOE NATHAN BALLLLLLLGHHHHHH!!!!...arr."
Michael Cuddyer (Teammate, care-bear): "Aww man...Joe and Justin warm the cockles of my heart. They make me want to hug puppies and save the world by radiating love and cuteness. Oh wait I do that anyways."
The New York Yankees (Satan): "Yeah it's too bad that pipe bomb we planted in their hotel room never went off..."
Johan Santanta (former teammate, rockstar): "They melt in your mouth, not in your hand. Mmmm...melty"
So, there you have it friends. A fair, impartial and completely true evaluation of our brilliant friends.
As cool as it is that Joe Mauer has won a gold glove, and as awesome as it is that we, your noble authors, have been acknowledged as the 9th Best Blog for Photoshopped Pictures of the Minnesota Twins, we feel a little bad for the magical garden gnome who inhabits our dugout.
Yesterday, Tampa Bay Rays manager Joe Maddon was named American League Manager of the year, and, yes, he deserved it, but even if he did we don't really enjoy seeing Gardy look like this year after year:
You see, every year, the Twins are pretty damn awesome, but before the next season begins we are told that we have no chance to perform well again. Then, we do. Throughout this remarkable run the roster has had a rotating cast, the pitchers have come and gone and free agents are fleeting. But we always have Gardy.
So it kind of stinks that in the 7 years he has been our manager, he has never been named manager of the year. He has finished in second place, four times now. Every other AL Central manager has beaten him to the hardware while he beats them on the field.
As he endures another winter without a shiny new accolade, we send Gardy our support--and the title of Official Peanuts From Heaven Garden Gnome! Congratulations Gardy...we will always love you.