A definition for the day:

Interminable (adj.): 1. Seemingly endless 2. The days between the end of the regular season and the start of the postseason.

In an effort to pass the time before the game...once again, let us all bask in the reflected glory of our great and glorious: Chairman Mauer.

(Note: you could watch this video 540 times before game one...but we here at Peanuts from Heaven encourage you to eat, communicate with loved ones and only watch it 529 times.)

An unpleasant definition

While Stinky is enjoying "Talk-Like-A-Pirate Day" at the Minnesota Renaissance festival, I watched the Twins game...and by the end of it wished I had driven from Ohio to the Ren Fest instead.

As mad as Gardy and pretty much everybody in the dugout/stands/watching at home was by the double play debacle, perhaps we can understand the confusion by reviewing a page from the dictionary issued to umpires by Major League Baseball:

Catch (v.): 1) To seize, hold, intercept or otherwise ensnare. 2) Or not, I guess, I mean, "truth" is so subjective, so go ahead and define things however you want, I don't care, I'm just a dictionary

CURSE YOU AMBIVALENT DICTIONARIES!!!

Another Definition:

Ominous (adj.) 1) Evoking a sense of trepidation or foreboding 2) Manny Ramirez

Another Definition:

Paradox (n.): 1) a person or thing made of supposedly contradictory elements; 2) the strange circumstances Twins fans encounter when we play the Tampa Bay Rays, because by beating them we are beating a scrappy, underdog squad of misfits led by a witty gnome-esque manager underneath a foreboding gray roof...and yet, if we lose to them we lose...so....Help?!?

A definition:

Comeuppance (n): 1) a richly deserved punishment; 2) getting your butt handed to you by the Cleveland Indians after you, and everyone you know wouldn't stop crowing about how awesome your last victory was.

That's all we'll say about that.