6.07.2011

Chicks love the small ball

First, how 'bout that draft? Nothing like the pulse pounding excitement of executives sitting in chairs and talking about things to get the blood pumping! Seriously though, I liked watching the draft, and got genuinely excited about the Twins' picks [though you might prefer to check the opinions of serious bloggers/analysts Seth Strohs and Nick Nelson rather than take my word]. The Twins picks (a shortstop who might be a major league starter sooner rather than later; a 3rd baseman with pop and a strong armed reliever type) sound like the kinds of guys who could help the team, and most of this year we sure could use some help.


Of course, during this last little winning streak it's felt a little bit better thanks largely to the fact that the bottom of the order and the plucky, scrappy, pirannah-esque role players are living up to their potential. Messrs Revere, Hughes, Tolbert, Casilla, Repko, Rivera and even Drew Butera have helped lead the charge first in Kansas City, and then again last night. Why the sudden turn of affairs? Maybe they took a Gardy speech to heart; maybe they got inspired by Field of Dreams or The Rookie, or those new pepsi commercials where Jim Thome spells his name for Babe Ruth; but I'm guessing they got punked by a vet and turned it to their advantage.

Seriously, can't you just picture a veteran player [for some reason I keep seeing Delmon Young], with a slight glint of mischief and a cackle of self-amusement looking at the young players on the bench and thinks: "It's June, I'm bored, let's have some fun." So said veteran approaches the young guys and says: "Hey dudes! What's up?"

The kids, awed at this personal contact with a big-time professional athlete get a little flummoxed and finally Revere says: "we were just talking about how cool it would be if we all started hitting home runs like ALL THE TIME!"

"Yeah!" says Hughes, "I've hit a couple, but if I just suddenly, you know, hit 3 in a week, or ten in a month, or 35 in a season...that'd be so awesome!"

"Golly!" shouts Tolbert, "if I hit home runs all the time I bet kids would fight for my baseball card..."

"And we'd get compliments on talk radio" says Repko

"And maybe girls would talk to us" says Rivera.

And the vet, chuckling says, "oh you guys! That's silly. Home runs aren't cool anymore. They're as out of date as Zach Braff and soul patches." (Then because Alexi Casilla looks hurt the vet has to say) "sorry Lexi. But seriously guys, it's not about the home runs, if you really want to impress people, hit the ball on the ground and run like hell. You should try to put down a great sac bunt or an effective grounder to second to advance a base runner, that's what the best players do!"

"Really?!?" They all ask in unison.

"Of course, haven't you seen how frequently the everyday players hit soft ground balls? It's an art form guys!! Do it well, and who knows, maybe the people will cheer for you"

"Even me?" Asks Butera.

"Even you, Drew!" says the vet, barely keeping the laughter in check.

And so the young scuffling hitters went out and chipped and chopped and bunted and ran and won game after game after game. Now we all cheer for them...even Drew Butera. [Great safety squeeze last night bro.] Best of luck tonight you new born piranahs (see if you can get those vets to follow your lead).

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