One week into the season, Tsuyoshi Nishioka broke his leg. A few days later it turned out that Kevin Slowey had hurt his shoulder. Then Joe Mauer had bi-lateral leg weakness. Then Justin Morneau had an epic five-day flu. Then Delmon Young got both the flu and some bruised ribs. Now Jim Thome is day-to-day with a strain, and word is Carl Pavano's got the flu.
That's 7 players including 3 starters missing significant chunks of time due to injury or illness. It's getting so bad that Target Field employees might consider replacing "Take Me Out to the Ballgame" with the theme from M*A*S*H. And while there are all kinds of explanations (limited game play during spring training...Delmon refusing to cover his mouth when he sneezes, etc.) we can only think of one explanation.
We're guessing that the Pohlad's have been using the same Office Safety Film every season for the past 51 years...and well...it might be a good idea to update it...just in case it follows this template
This might work well in the Twins front office...but sadly, it doesn't cover other important things (like stretching/not vomiting on eachother). However, it should be noted that no Twins player has had their head slammed in a filing cabinet in 51 years, the longest such streak in the majors.
Have fun watching the double header today! (We peanuts will check in as we can...but with finals fast approaching it might not be doable)