7.17.2010

Nail Bitin'

So Stinky and I actually got to *watch* the baseball game last night (it was a big moment for two people who have forgone cable in the name of education...or more accurately two people who can't afford both cable tv and eating on a student's income).

A couple of thoughts:

1) Delmon is a talented athlete, which is nice to see after so many years of little mincing feet, the big fella can lope around there pretty well.

2) My Smoke Monster sound effects aren't so much ominous as they are random and chaotic..not unlike the smoke monster himself!

3) Life is a whole lot easier for baseball fans when your pitching isn't awful. Witness: Innings 1-8, everything was fine! Frankie pitched very very well, then Matty G. got him out of a jam. But when our tattooed closer turned into Johnny the Grauch (all covered with garbage and stinking up the joint) we were forced to turn to our old pal, Jesse Crain. (See picture below)
Jesse's a nice dude, he's friendly and amenable and certainly better than 98.9% of the world at playing baseball...but sadly he's been struggling a lot lately with the 1.1% he actually plays against. So much as we like him, seeing him in the bull pen was cause for a whole lot of: "No, no! Please oh please oh please NO!"

And yet he entered and what's more he conquered! He did so well in fact that we must revive our old nickname for Jesse: "Ze UBER MENSCH!"--because he's not just a nice guy, he's an UBER nice guy! And also, with the bald head and goatee we can see him going toe-to-toe with Niezche pretty easily.
So in honor of Ze Ubermensch, raise your steins Twins Territory and contemplate the infathomable nothingness of the Black Uniforms worn by the White Sox...it may perhaps seem contradictory to wear black when the word "white" is in your name, but perhaps the perplexing paradigm of binary forces (day-night, black-white, good-Chicago) which necessitates the existence of said Pale Hosers in order to fully appreciate the beauty of Twins baseball.

Or maybe baseball's just awesome. Yeah...let's go with that.

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