I will warn you right up front, this is a post written in frustration.
Tonight was ridiculous. We should have had it wrapped up in the 8th but instead...well, you saw what happened. I will try to direct this post at those towards whom my frustration is aimed and who are responsible for this ridiculousness, and for the fact that I am writing a baseball blog at 12:30 on a Thursday. I usually don't like to vent my anger and frustration towards my own team but sometime you just have to let the beast out of its cage:
Dear Joe West - thanks for the worst call ever in the world, and for just generally sucking at life. (on a related note - thanks to Gardy for being awesome and totally bad-ass, and for randomly throwing a towel in anger. little things like this make me believe that the world is still a good place).
Dear Scott Baker - while you are not directly responsible for anything that went wrong this evening, I just think you should know that your face looks terrible. Like, really bad and not in a funny way. You look like you got drunk last night, rubbed glue all over yourself and then fell face-first onto a buffalo, and while it might be fun to tell your teammates "man, I totally fell on this buffalo last night with glue on my face it was so crazy!", nobody wants to look at that. Not OK, Scotty B ...not OK.
Dear J.J. Hardy - please learn to catch and throw the ball. I realize this is a lot to ask of you as a professional baseball player, but hey, a little effort and skill never hurt anyone. Like, when the ball rolls past you, you should probably catch it...and then, I dunno, maybe throw it to first base within a reasonable amount of time? I'm not an expert or anything, but it's just a suggestion. I don't think this is too much to expect. I mean yes, you look kind of pretty and stuff, but like the song says, baby it's a wild world and it's hard to get by just on a smile. Jesus never smiled.
...OK that was a lie, but it just seemed like the thing to say.
It's very late. I have to bake a cake in the morning. I'm going to bed.
-Stinky
Excellent post! The frustration is warranted and I approve of the angry tirade.
ReplyDeleteAnd Stinky, what a coincidence! You are baking a cake today, and I plan to EAT a cake today. An attempt to bury my emotions, I guess.
Yes!!! Margo, cake heals all wounds. Unfortunately my cake is going to a bachelorette party so I can't eat the whole thing myself, but i'll try to hoard as much of it as possible :)
ReplyDeleteAgreed! Baked goods will solve everything!!!
ReplyDeleteI'm trying not to read or listen to anything else baseball related until tonight's game...crankiness does not help.
So to sum up
Baked Goods = AWESOME
Crankiness = Not