After much gnashing of teeth I have finally accessed the MLB.tv streaming of the Twins game from Anahiem. Unfortunately, feeling sickly means I'm going to bed sooner rather than later and will hope that my colleague Stinky covers the game in all its glory tomorrow.
But before I go to bed I thought I would introduce a new feature here on Peanuts from Heaven: The Clash of the Talking Heads. Since I will be forced to watch announcers from other cities on every road trip, I thought I might as well give you (the fans) a taste of how the other half lives. I'll let you know their credentials, analyze their chatter, provide a sample quotation, and rank them on a scale of 0-5 Blylevens (each Blyleven is equal to approximately 28 watts of awesomeness) If anyone can max out the scale, they will earn our grudging respect, and a bag of Raisinettes.
Tonight's Contestants: Victor Rojas and Mark Gubicza of the Angels "FSN-West" team.
Credentials: Gubicza was a 14 year veteran pitcher of moderate success, (and with an infinitely amusing name--just like Blyleven) Rojas is a broadcast rookie from a baseball family in his first big job. And he sounds very very hopeful that he might just become the next legendary announcer of our life times.
Analysis: Not good. They have very forced banter but very little in the way of in depth analysis. They seem to trade off every fifteen seconds: Rojas announces the event, Gubicza explains it, Rojas announces the event Gubicza explains it. There's very little give and take or comfortable questioning, like you might find with Dick and Bert or more rehearsed teams. All of which makes their "playful banter" slightly awkward, like when apparently talked about "rocking the snuggie"
Best quote: "Can I get an extra plate of nachos free with my bling?"--Rojas
Rating: 1 Blyleven (may improve as Rojas settles in...but right now...not so good)
Now for bed. FINGERS CROSSED