Tonight's contestants: Those Windy City blowhards Ken "Hawk" Harrelson & Steve Stone
Credentials: The White Sox have one of those rare broadcast combinations--two former players, more than that two all-stars, and Stone even has a Cy Young. So clearly they understand the game rather well.
Analysis: The most politic thing to say here is that we'll have to agree to disagree. Having spoken to loyal legume (reader and collaborator) Chris Clark, we've been given to understand that Hawk Harrelson is a Chicago institution. As well he should be, he's often funny and honestly a throwback to an earlier era of announcers, guys who called the whole game by themselves, invented their own patter, became intimately associated with one team and ruled the stadium from on high. The only downside to this is that Hawk Harrelson is not Vin Scully or Ernie Harwell or even Jon Gordon; Hawk Harrelson is more of an unabashed fan than announcer, between his unswerving devotion to his team, his repetitive mockery of all opponents and total inability to restrain himself from employing favored catch-phrases, he's more like a drunken guy three rows back than a professional broadcaster. (Also: Steve Stone exists...that's all I can really say in terms of analysis...Harrelson dominates it)
Best quote(s): "We're in deep doodoo"/"We've got Trouble........right here in River City"--Harrelson
Rating: .5 Blylevens (I admittedly laughed at some comments, just like I do at drunks at the ballgame, but 3.5 hours of that...painful)