Season Preview V

Baseball is like school, everyone has their own class (division), their own circle of friends (salary strata), their own inimitable style (way of playing the game)

It is in that spirit that this year's Peanuts from Heaven Season Preview focuses on the high school archetypes embodied by each team, the memorable things they have done, and where they'll undoubtedly end up when the season ends six months from now.

We go now to the division everyone but us loves: The American League East
1st--Boston Red Sox
The Queen Bee Wannabe
Quote: "Don't feel so bad, it's not your fault you're poor."
Where they'll be in 6 months: begging for your sympathy because the first round of the playoffs is "like, totally hard," and "it's been like forever since our last championship!"

2nd--Tampa Bay Rays
Shrimp Turned Pimp
Quote: "The theory of relativity is very simple actually..."
Where they'll be in 6 months: losing the championship series, but winning at life.

3rd--New York Yankees
Queen Bee
Quote: "That outfit is SO cute. I'd totally wear that...if I didn't have so much money."
Where they'll be in 6 months: Out of the playoffs and into a shark pit.

4th--Toronto Blue Jays
Foriegn Exchange Student
Quote: "I'm not that foriegn, eh?"
Where they'll be in 6 months: Wherever the hell they came from.

5th--Baltimore Orioles
Dance Team Captain
Quote: "Wanna see my baton twirling."
Where they'll be in 6 months: not as bad as they are now...which is pretty is to do.

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